I woke up with a disease

Uh huh... I caught your curiosity didn't I?

Seriously, I did really wake up with a disease.  I've actually been waking up with the disease for quite some time now.  It's quite manageable, actually.  Sometimes, I don't seem to notice it very much and other times it really flares up.  The ebb and flow can even happen in the course of a day.

I have lived with this disease since I was born and it was really, really bad as an infant, but my mom and dad did they best they could and I grew out of it...kind of.  My teenage years seem to exacerbate the disease but after a few big lessons in my early adulthood, I learned how to keep the disease under wraps a little bit better.  Hide it from the outside world.  At the age of 30 I realized I could no longer "get happy" without treating the disease.

If you are still reading... your eyes must be the size of saucers (and quite honestly, I can't believe you didn't close out your browser window!) so I'll spill the beans now.

I've got the "me" disease.  So you can cancel that 1-800-flowers order you got queued up on the other browser window and put away the "Get well soon" card.  I've just got the "me" disease.  You know the disease...I bet you know people who suffer from it.  Here are some symptoms:

-The world according to "them."
-Enough about me, let's talk about you...what do you think of me?
-I can't help you, I'm too busy helping me!
-It's MY time.
ME, ME, ME

Do you know anyone who has ever had moments like that?  After you make that mental list... go ahead and step away from the computer to do an exercise for me.  Go turn on the light in the bathroom and find a mirror.  Oh yes...yes I just did.  I called you out.  Because we all suffer from the "me" disease, somewhere inside of us...its always there!

The good news is that I found a couple of cures and ways to treat it.  The bad news is that we'll always have to deal with it.

The inspiration of this entry comes from a sermon I heard from Carl Lentz, an amazing, dynamic pastor out of Hillsong New York.   God is using him in mighty ways...but my favorite is for Carl's ability to tell it how it is and instead of being offended by his unorthodox approach... you're snorting in laughter!

He set the topic up by describing all of the feedback (complaints) they get from people about the church he pastors:  "Can't you play some some of the older hymns?"  "I can't see the screen from the back rows."  "Every time I come to church I end up sitting by new people- I'm just not connecting."  "I've met you 3 times and you don't remember me."  "You showed a promo clip that had secular music."  "The music is too loud, too soft, too fast, too slow, too heavy on drums, too heavy on guitar...." and so on.  The point here is that people's feedback about the church is that it should have been more tailored to be the perfect church for them.  Ahhhh....the "me" disease, revealed.


We don't have to do it in church.  Don't we do it everywhere?  The meetings are too boring, the conference calls too early, the body pump instructor too perky, the Kindergarten teacher too demanding.   The sun is too bright, the sun isn't out enough, the sun is killing my lawn.  My neighbors are too nosy, my neighbors never socialize with us.   Ahhhh....the "me" disease.  


The problem is, the world wasn't just made for us.  (News flash, I know.)  It's not about us, all the time.    But hey, for those of you who like to beat yourself over the head with a cast iron skillet, keep in mind that we are ALL created in a fallen world and are victim to this disease.

So now that we have it, what do we do to "manage it?"

Keep the focus off of us.  (Even as I write this, I'm cracking up at how bad I am about this.  My husband would be the first to tell you.)  OK, seriously, enough about ME.... back to how to fix you!  Do you SEE how easy it is to keep the focus on ourselves?  How does this affect me?????  Right?  Okay, well you have to defer the focus from you...when you do, it forces you to focus on others.

I believe mothers have an easier shot at this because from the moment we realize we are carrying life, we must shift from our selfish desires and focus on our growing child.  We abstain from alcohol, tobacco, drugs, ibuprofen, and whatever else the doctor orders!  (That was not my personal list, by the way.)  When a child is born we quickly learn that life is no longer about us.  Rather, it's about our newborn child and we can even go to the extreme end of the spectrum, taking the focus off ourselves because it is now poured out on our child.  (This would include forgetting to eat, shower, shave, give attention to our husbands... can I get an Amen up in here?)

So how do we keep the focus off ourselves if we aren't mothers or Jesus resurrected?  Easy.  Focus on others.  It will take some muscle memory, but its impossible to serve yourself equally while you are serving someone else.  (Now, I will plug that Jesus had this down pretty well.  Crack open that dusty bible of yours  and spend some time reading: Mark 9:35 and Matthew 20:16 are great places to start.)

WIFM?  You didn't think I was going to write something about how to serve anyone else without you getting some sort of win in it, did you?  And I know there is NO WAY you would have read this long if you didn't think there was something in it for you.  We're human.... it's okay!  Good grief...no one goes into motherhood for 18 years of servitude not expecting some sort of payoff!  You don't serve, serve, serve at work without expecting something for your dedication, right?

So here's what you get:  a better you.  Oh, I can hear it now.  The exhales.  The sigh's.  The... "are you kidding me's?"  It's like when I tell my older boys how proud I am of their great behavior and helpfulness at the grocery store.  Their reply?  "What do we get?"  I tell them, "Knowing that your mom is proud of you."  Oh, you should see the looks.

So in all seriousness...here are a few more "perks" of managing your "me" disease:

1.  A better world with more people caring for one another.

2.  A "pay it forward"  mentality

3.  A different perspective on things (church service isn't about you...the meeting isn't about you... your children's lives (and what they wear out the door in sprite of your best persuasion) isn't about you.

4.  An opportunity to witness the miracles that are happening all around us.  When we aren't so busy examining ourselves with a fine tooth comb, its amazing to see the work God is doing; faith is being strengthened, prayers are being answered.

But it all has to start with us.  I believe an individual change can begin to change the world.  The problem is, and I realize this contradicts the entire point of this entry...is that it starts with us (YOU!).  So before you abandon the "me" disease altogether.  Start with "yourself" and begin to think of others today.  How can you demonstrate your own "anti-me" campaign today?