I'm distracted by distractions

I'm pouting.

It's 3:47 in the afternoon and I've written two paragraphs.  That's it.  That's all.

My amazing husband and cherished children took off this morning at 9:22, embarking on a 3 1/2 day journey to the Washington Coast for a boys camping adventure.  The first, might I add, for my almost 3-year-old son.  Just in case you were wondering, I WAS invited.

I politely declined.

And then, inside my head... I did the "mommy has alone time" dance.  Well, maybe I didn't do it ALL in my head.. maybe a bit of it escaped in the form of a hoot and holler when I learned I would have the house to myself from Monday morning til Thursday afternoon.

At first I went on a mission to schedule every single "maintenance and upkeep" appointment humanly possibly.  After all, this engine has 39 years on it and well, contrary to popular belief (mostly by my endearing husband) I don't just "look this way" without a little effort.  He's probably chuckling right now since I'm a certified "open mouth" sleeper...as if you could look less attractive while you are asleep- mouth gaping open catching flies...oh jeez, not a pretty site.

Where was I?  Golly, I am SO distracted!

Ahhh yes, maintenance.  So, I have hair booked, brows booked, errands scheduled and a grand list of things I'd like to do.

But wait... my heart cried out.... "what about THE BOOK?"
Oh right...the BOOK.  You know, the one I am supposed to be writing?  The one who's book titles fly through my head at 11:24 at night when I should be FAST ASLEEP, stocking up for chasing my munchkins around???  (And really, from what I hear, the editor will probably change the name of my book anyway!  Seriously, Erin...go to sleep.)

But, my heart is right...when else will I get 3 days to write?  Perhaps as my 3 year old packs up for college?  And so I backed off of the errands... certainly kept the hair appointment.... as if!.... and silenced my phone (OMG...so hard) so I could write.

By now my husband has the car unloaded... tent up... snacks out and probably the start of some really good "camping food" dinner and I have 2 paragraphs.  7 hours and 233 words?  Really?

Oh wait...that's not all I have done today....

I've googled and looked at over 73 web pages of vacation rentals in Nuevo Vallarta.  Caught up on Facebook... for an hour... looking at pictures of people I DON'T EVEN KNOW!!!!

I've eaten lunch, 1/4 of a honeydew melon and perused the pantry for God knows what.

I vacuumed 2 rooms and our entry rug.

I worked out for an hour at a boot camp class (which will certainly come back to haunt me tomorrow morning as I attempt to decent the stairs.)

I watered the plants....weeded a bit... tried to find the army of slugs eating my Columbine plant... picked some blueberries.

Taught myself a bit of piano using my 6 year old's "beginning piano" book.

OH SWEET JESUS WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???

We are distracted by distractions.

I refuse to accept that I am alone.  I cannot be the only one who deals with this.

Yet I commented on someone's FB account (snort) about a ink she has posted regarding the passing of a long-time anchorwoman in Seattle's passing.  I made a comment about what a reminder death is that we are vapor...our lives so short and temporary... and tomorrow is never guaranteed.

I, OF ALL PEOPLE...am the queen of preaching from my soapbox about "living in today."  And what am I doing?  If I die this evening my last memory is handfuls of chocolate covered raisins and a clean entry rug?  Really?????

I believe it boils down to one big fat juicy reason that might blow your mind... mine too.

FEAR.

Woooo weee... I had to take a minute and stare at that word.  Powerful.  A big fat smack across the face... in a very loving way.

You see, we were all born with desires.  I'm not talking about the earthly ones... nice house, fast car, spouse, kids, world- traveled... blah, blah, blah....

I'm talking about the ones God put in your heart when he first formed you.  It's funny, they say that the human race shares 99.9% of the same DNA which isn't that hard to believe when you recognize that for the most part... we care about the same things... most of us share some of the same inherit values of humankind.  But I love what sets us apart and that is our passions...our dreams... our answers to "what would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?"

Some would save all of Africa.
Some would run a sub 2-hour marathon.
Some would cure cancer.
Some would adopt 25 children (God bless you.)
Some would start their own company.
Some would lose 20 pounds.
Some would ask that really nice guy out for coffee.

It is no accident when you answer that question- that's the God wiring in you...it's how you were created...what he purposed you for...IF YOU DARE TO BELIEVE YOU CAN DO IT.

So.... fear....that must be it.  If I sit down to write my book and dedicate these 3 days to it..then I better have something to show for it.  I better have a best seller by the end of the week.  The words should just FLY under my fingertips at the keyboard.  Well...not necessarily.

So, whose voice is that?  Why do you we think we're distracted?

Oh yeah...some of you guys are getting this.  Because if you think God is real, and Heaven is real, then you have to accept that the Enemy is real too and he didn't come to be your friend, my friends; he came to steal, kill and destroy.  There's nothing greater to him than me vacuuming...because it means that the "fear bug" he put in my head is alive and well... when I'm wiping down my counters...I'm not writing.  When I'm checking out my first friend from 2nd grade's FB page.. I"m not writing.

Well, la te da.... devil...take that... I just wrote a WHOLE BUNCH.

So I will not over think this time.  I know my mom's just dying to comment on this entry about eating an elephant...one bite at a time.  I don't need an outline, I don't need to have read 34 pages in my bible to "get in the mood" nor do I need clean floors.  I just need to put my head down and let God do his work through me.  After all, this book isn't about me or the money it will generate or seeing my name in print.  No, its about fulfilling a promise that was spoken over my life that I would "write a book that would birth a movement for women around the world."  Well, up until then I had written about a whopping 6 articles in my life.  Sure I enjoyed writing as I grew up; it was always an easy thing for me...but God also blessed me well in real estate, recruiting and other professions.  So when someone tells you that not only are you capable, but you were created to change the world for women through your writing... that's heavy stuff... that's big stuff.... but only if its about ME... and I think I'm the one doing it.

"I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me."  Phil 4:13

So often our emphasis is on the "I CAN" in that sentence.  I was reminded over the weekend that just the smallest shift of emphasis makes a WORLD of difference.  I can do all things THROUGH CHRIST who strengthens me."

And so, I believe...I"m off and running.

Now do me a favor.  Don't call.  Don't post stuff on FB that I could be tempted with (unless you have some Nuevo Vallarta 2 BR condo you'd like to donate to us for a week next year) and I'll resurface at the end of the week and update you on this elephant I'm about to take down!

But, of course... this isn't one sided... I HAVE to know if I'm out on an island here.
Are you easily distracted?  What are your snares?
What do YOU think you are distracted from really doing?